How two young souls, take their seperate ways
and walk out of each others lives, never expecting to look the other’s face
the same way again, the one thing they fell for first.

Walking the boardwalk of life, here I stood,
a patron guide to two paths, watching them intertwine once more,
to twist and turn, as the road hugged each other
for the first time, in a long time.

It was ‘hello’ to an old friend. But something so much more

Tied to a bouquet of balloons,
their ties were slowly nicked from end to end, 
Falling ever so slowly, 
into something unknown. 

I think it’s wonderful,
Terrifying, yet beautiful. 
And I think it’s wonderful
how butterflies,
make you feel like you can fly. 

You started the year with it, you’re ending the year with it.
It’s cute as fuhhh too.
Lord have mercy on me and my poor soul.
I don’t think I can handle anymore of this.

I’ll be going to sleep just as I woke up.

Twisting and turning,

clutching these pillows in my arms,

neither side of the bed is comfortable enough.

I wish these pillows could hug back.

I think we’d all sleep easier then.

Waking up wouldn’t be so hard,

when you have someone by your side.

I will feel different. 
Different than what I feel today.
Today was something weird.
Weird, odd, and a mess of things.
Things were good, weren’t they?
They were all smiles, laughs, and it felt nice.
Nice to know that with everything going on, we could take a break.
A break from this hectic game called life.

Maybe tomorrow, I’ll feel differently about all of this.
Maybe tomorrow, I can cheer you up, and you’ll smile back at me.
Maybe tomorrow, we can sit in each other’s silence, and not feel tempted to break it.
Maybe,
tomorrow.
And that scares me, how fickle my heart beats. 

I’ve slowly been falling for you. Again. You let me go, shove me away; only to grab me by the hand, and make my heart melt, all over again. When you push the tempo, when you tell me you miss me, when you ask me out. It sends my head for a whirl, and I don’t know what to think of it. There are times where a single word may not be exchanged, and those days make me wanna curl up in a ball and scream “fuck the world”. But then there are times, where we’ll be inseparable, and I have to try so damn hard to keep myself from just grabbing you by the waist and planting one right on you. I like those days better.

I’m tired. I can only imagine how you’re hanging.

sucks frankly. It bounces between sincere expression to borderline attention seeking.
I am troubled. 

Everything was just so much…worse, I guess. 

My head was in the wrong place.
I was scared,
I was afraid.

And now, look at me,
look at us.

What a difference a year makes.
It’s such a shame it took me this long,
to become the person I wanted to be.

A wasted year, I say.
I just wish we had more time together.
I really did.
I don’t want it to end. 

23 days and counting.

There is none.

No bleeding sense to unravel myself for everyone to see.

Because now, it truly is everyone, from near and far between.

Coupled with the bittersweet fact,

that I’ve lost my knack,

and my writing…

Well let’s hope its intact. 

This place is no longer safe for me, 

to expose and to open up.

But I haven’t given up yet,

on this safe haven that I’ve made my own.

It’s just not exactly home

anymore.

I’m stepping out of this door and into another,

and there is no urge

no blood filled rage

no teenage angst

no hopeless romantic

left in me to turn around,

and step back in.

Choosing a college is a pain in the ass and I can’t believe I’ve waited this long to actually try to figure out where I’m gonna go and now I feel like it’s too late to go to the right school I wanna go to and I don’t wanna feel like I’m wasting my time in some dead end school like Pomona even though I know I have this job security, or so they say. But I don’t wanna justify going to a school just on ‘partying’ or my friends, which is basically my whole argument for SDSU, and then there’s Davis, which is the best of both worlds cuz I’ll get a great education while being with my friends, but waitlisting is such a bitching tease! I just want to be with my friends :( im simple like that.

*sigh* Anyways, SDSU sounds like fun, if my mom doesn’t kill me. The only sucky part about missing school is, again, my friends, and soooo much is happening I can’t believe im missing it. We’re gonna go four for four with prom dates and it sucks i won’t be there!

Plus, there’s this cute girl in my math class i wanted to ask out to come over and bake cookies with me because she’s really unbelievably pretty and has this adorable smile and whenever we talk i try not to make eye contact because i start to stare at her like an idiot because she’s so freaking cute it makes my tongue go all stupid and i get all nervous about what im gonna say and i pray to god she doesn’t think im and idiot, because she gives great hugs and makes me feel like I can take on the whole world with just her smile.

God she makes me go crazy. She’d never go for a guy like me.

I haven’t smiled like this in a long time. 

It feels good.